I make the same resolutions each year a) shed the lard mountain that is my arse in my new diet and exercise regime which lasts the exact amount of time it takes me to walk from the sofa to the last of the mince pies in the kitchen cupboard, b) marry the tall, dark handsome (and rich, though not a definite deal breaker) stranger I've been dreaming of since I was 15 c) win the lottery.
I know the first one is definitely a pipe dream, but the other two are definitely 'do'able.....
So are resolutions 'do'able or just a comfort blanket we surround ourselves with after we've eaten all the ferrero rocher and thrown the empty wine bottles for recycling?
I can honestly say, hand on heart, I've achieved all of none of the above. I have made the same ones pretty much year in year out and failed spectacularly at achieving neither.
Firstly, I'm still single. I've just googled to see whether there are more men than women in the world and its roughly equal but men have the slight lead with 101 men to 100 women, so where is he, number 101, the man that's supposed to sweep me off my feet, shower me with gifts and not complain when I ask him to put the bins out 10 years down the line, I'm still waiting.
Secondly, I'm still hauling around with me a derriere which is slowing starting to migrate southwards for the late 30's and shows no sign of going anywhere, though in my defence I actually quite like my curvaceous hips, I would like them slightly smaller, but they've stuck with me through fat and thin so I can't complain (too much).
Thirdly, I need to buy a lottery ticket!
So why do we make them, these resolutions type things. Is it really that we just need a glimmer of hope and something to hold onto to take us through each day of our lives, up until about March when we realise it's not happening and crack open the cheap chardonnay, the family size bar of galaxy and watch the Hollyoaks omnibus in our pyjamas....ok, just me then!
For whatever reasons you make them and whichever ones you make, I wish you good luck. I've decided not to make any this year I'm just going to see what happens. I realised that I've got no willpower and I'm only setting myself up for a fall so I'm embracing the what will be will be frame of mind, and to hell with it. If I'm destined to be married to Jason Statham, I will be.
Good luck for 2011 everyone and I hope it really does bring you every success you wish for.
Till next time....x
P.S. Anyone want a malteser??
